Answers (Tuesday, April 19, 2011 / 2:50 AM)
I've been up since 6.30 AM of 18 April 2011. I am a fucking machine/muscle car. And I am not proud to say that I am cranky and tired and tomorrow is a long day. I think I've been overworking myself but I feel like what I'm doing is still not and will never be enough. And I'm sure that there are many out there who feel the same way as me and it's such a sad and demoralizing feeling to have because it makes you feel like you're not and will never be good enough.
I also however fear the day where I work so hard but I eventually lose steam and die off but as of now that is not happening to me thankfully because of the wonderful support I have from Dave and my girlfriends in school who never fail to shower concern over me as well as my parents who are fantastic in their own ways.
As tired as I must admit I am, I don't feel the right-ness of suddenly give up just like that and losing steam. But I still am very afraid.
All the what if...
What if I study so hard and still eventually fail to meet my objectives?
What if I get good grades but I don't get to do something I enjoy in the future?
What if I find out I wasted 2 years of my life in school when I could have done better elsewhere?
Lord I am tired of all these bogging questions. I wish someone else would answer them for me. Instead of me having to find answers by myself.
